HAPPY BIRTHDAY BALONG!

Goldolock's cake na binili sa San Jose, litsong manok mula sa malaking bahay, magnolia ice cream at coke zero sa Lean's, at isang bilaong pansit malabon ni Thelma...

KULE CONFESSIONS

Malaki ang utang na loob ko sa Kule.

Dito ako nabigyan ng break. Dito ako natuto. Dito nag-umpisa ang kuwento ni Kimat T. Amianan. Isang baul na alaala ang naipon ko dito. Katulad ng...

... pagbo-bonfire namin sa mga inanay na back issues ng Collegian kasama si DanLop at ang kararating na si Caloy. [Ngayon, alam niyo na kung bakit kokonti at halos walang natirang mga lumang issue ng Kule.]

... magdamagang presswork na nag-exempt sa akin na mag-field sa CMT. [Sir M: Bagsak ka dahil madami kang absent. / Ako: Baka naman puede pang ayusin 'yan sir. / Sir M: Sige, paligayahan mo na lang ako read: alak at pulutan. / Ako: Okey po. / Sir M: Bakit ka nga ba laging absent? / Ako: Tiga Collegian kasi ako sir, Biyernes ang press work namin kaya madalas umaabsent na lang ako dahil sa puyat. / Sir M: (Biglang namula) Nagbibiro lang ako ha! Sige, sa HQ ka na lang palaging magreport, pasado ka na.]

... ang CEGP at ang mga madalas na magka-crush sa akin mula sa ibang school. [Puera biro, di naman ako pogi pero bakit kaya? Dahil nga ba sa buhaghag na toothbrush na laging naksuksok sa back pocket ng maong kong butas-butas?]

... si News Editor ko na hindi pala naka-enroll at ang matinding debate namin nang ipitin ko ang istorya niya tungkol sa isang Dekanong inakusahan ng sexual harassment. [Nag-sorry din sa akin 'yung "News Editor" pero hindi na ako natulungan n'un. 'Yung Dean, inuutangan ko kasi ng pamasahe pauwi. Noon ko pa na-realize na mali ang ginawa ko. Sorry pa rin kahit wala nang ibig sabihin ito ngayon.]

... 'yung pagkakatsuktsak ko sa kalagitnaan ng aking termino na nagsilbing sangangdaan ng aking paglalakbay. [Bukod sa na-realize kong lahat ng bagay sa mundo ay hindi permamnente at natuto akong huwag mag-expect ng kapalit sa aking mga ginagawa ay nakilala ko pa ang isang propetang palaboy mula sa San Jose].

Madami pa. Pero saka na yung kuwento.

Ang gusto ko munang sabihin ay kung anuman ang narating ko ngayon ay dahil sa Kule.

Lahat ng mga sumunod ay bunga na lamang ng aking pagiging Kule.

MGA LARAWAN (mula itaas pababa): (1) Si Mam Ayet na unang nagpa-intindi sa akin sa teknikal na bahagi ng pagsusulat sa pamamagitan ng isang liham kahilingan sa PPDO; (2) si Tolits Circa na kabiyak ng dalwang mahuhusay na kartunista (si Tolits Saliganan yung isa) na dumating sa Kule sa maikling panahon ng aking pamamatnugot; (3) ang mga unang dumalo sa unang homecoming ng The Plowman/CLSU Collegian; at (4) ang post-homecoming party ng ilan sa mga Kule alumni sa roof top bar ni Tolits Circa. 

ANG MANINIYOT

Naniniyot ng pagkain...

...naniniyot habang kumakain.

* Lahat ng larawan ay kuha ni Usec. Fred Serrano sa Bangkok, Thailand samantalang ang may akda ang tanging may sala sa isinagawang processing. 

HUDDLED: A UNFCCC PANSIT MOMENT

Uncle Sam asked William Tell to come to his place.

Old World and Down Under joined them.

Afterwards came the Emperor and the Czar.

Lots of hushed conversation. (Was that giggling or laughter?).

The 132 were asked to join. (Was that some dogs yelping?).

More hushed exchanges.

Flashing cameras meant something good is cooking.

There it was on the screen!

Almost done except for some more from Samba and Kamasutra.

Finally, "We have an agenda!" (Applause)

That's how the Big J and Ginebra San Miguel plotted and won its games.

In huddles.

FOOTNOTE: The photo immediately above shows the Adaptation negotiators of Team Philippines: (from left) Ateng Dinna Umengan, me, and Ateng Alice Ilaga. We are a tight knit Masonicaly related group with Kuya Usec. Fred Serrano, he who took this photo, as our bostsip. The photo processing is mine.

THE LONGEST DAY

How long does it take to draft an agenda?

5 minutes like in the YS days when agendas were plucked off the air?

An hour maybe after going over the minutes of the previous meeting like what we do in KOOL NE and KKPMPC and what not?

Longer, like a week perhaps, including the prescribed duration of sending out notices for more stiff meetings?

For the 192 parties of the UNFCCC, it may take more than that. Like maybe the whole session of the AWG-LCA opening plenary.

Which spilled over the next day after the eruption of clashing opinions adjourned the plenary. And then the next day and day after that next day and so on for the whole 5 days. Suddenly, negotiators were caught in an unexpected downpour of free time and a whirlwind of almost nothing to do.

For his seemingly inept faculties in preventing such acrimonious and drawn-out agenda building process, I award the AWG-LCA chair a plate of Hotel De' Moc 's bland lunch pasta.

On the other hand, I give a plate of sweet Asian breakfast noodles to the distinguished lady from Venezuela whose interventions I await like an onion crop waiting for a good price in my province of Nueva Ecija, and whose fire and brimstone tirades at you-know-who provided much needed relief to an otherwise frustrating exercise of diplomatic tact and niceties.

There will be no noodles though for ECO who published rumors (in their own words) about the Philippines being a blocker in the agenda drafting process when it was in fact merely raising a legitimate procedural question. Who told them that anyway?

FOOTNOTE: That's me in the top photo listening to UNFCCC Negotiations 101 from veteran diplomat and legendary Philippines negotiator Bernarditas Mueller (left) during the Thai Royal Government's reception ceremonies for the delegates to the Bangkok Climate Talks. Photo taken by Usec Fred Serrano, processing by me.

STUCK IN AN ELEVATOR

I said I'll burn a kilo in Bangkok.

So I walked to and from the UNESCAP everyday.

Rice was a no-no and really tightened on the diet to the point of not having any dinner.

My solemn obligation was never to use the hotel elevator going up and down my 6th floor room.

I tried hard but on the 4th day, I gave in to the temptation of big bowl of beef noodles which the devil said would be great with a plate of spicy pork salad and a slice of blue berry cheesecake.

I thought the German UN staff was cute so I started riding the shuttle with her.

On the last day, I finally took the slow rickety elevator ride up and immediately wished I had not when the floor indicator started going crazy at the 4th floor and it became stop-and-go from there.

The lights went off and on and off and so I yelled for help.

It was like that for 10 minutes before a muffled Thai conversation announced a possible rescue.

I managed to to pry the inner door an inch and finally saw my first human after what seemed like an eternity.

At last, the handyman came with the keys and that's when I learned that the elevator was midway between the 6th and 7th floors.

The UNFCCC intersessional in Bangkok was like that.

Stuck in an elevator.

FOOTNOTE: The photo of me above inside the UNESCAP plenary hall was taken by Usec. Fred Serrano. The photo processing is mine.