EMPIRE OF THE SONS AND DAUGHTER

Sprouting from an alliance of the erudites and those helped by God, Scientia Dynastia now straddle a swath of territory from Almaguer to Artacho through Bakal 2, inconspicuous but protected by the Master of Rome who was murdered by his mistress' son to usher the ascension of Augustus the Adopted as the first emperor of the Roman Empire who ruled when the Messiah was born in Bethlehem to be crucified in the time of Tiberius the Reluctant, Rome's second potentate and precedent to The Mad Emperor who fornicated with his sisters, the empire intact until 14 emperors later when the Reign of Terror ended in the hands of Narcissus to signal its decline as our dynasty expanded to the third generation that was celebrated with a lunch of nilagang baka and ginataang paksiw na tuna between quarantined holidays, a pagan christmas tree and the Spanish farol and belen from the Phantom Biker's daily forage displayed as the coat of arms for the season.     

Like The Ripper of West Yorkshire and Manchester, the virus lurk to strike undetected which the Pugad Baboy branch of the dynasty fended with physical distancing, surgical masks and face shields as the Kingdom of Bakal 2 observed noched buena with a shabu-shabu hotpot, The Windsors parodized by the Thursday Club on Christmas Day with huge bottles of San Miguel Beer Grande in lieu of a Dubonnet Cocktail and a plateful of fried marinated tuna in lieu of dark chocolate while in Baloc the next day, Arisu and Usagi were surreptitiously initiated as Entered Apprentices having parted with Alice in Borderland, and were welcomed with a feast of pork barbecue, pinakbet, ensaladang talong, ginataang hipon and tinolang manok sans rice. 

Finally, the number one rule in The Fundamentals of Caring is to log at least 20 kilometers in the bike trails everyday, something Ben and Trevor missed as they search for the world's largest bovine and deepest pit while in Bakal 2, Jeronicus joined the rice planters in a chorus on the Jingle Jangle of A Christmas Journey as the Phantom Biker pass by to the market and back.  

PANCIT CANTON, ADOBO, CHICKEN WINGS atbp

It was the 20th of December and the feast day of St. Dominc of Silos, patron saint of prisoners and pregnant women, when the magic sleigh with 60,000 tons of gifts crash landed during a journey to Greenland, 118 kilos of Santa Claus tumbling into an arctic festival of raw seal liver and french pancakes in Kullorsuaq where Rabindranath Tagore is seducing Nukkanguaq's frozen libido with a sensual narration of the illicit affair between Sharmila's husband and sister, graphic illustrations of an intense cunnilungus between Mrinal the husband leaver and Kalyani who rejected a marriage proposal etched in snow to mark their liberation while a phantasm of  the horny widow Roopmatu played with herself and the northern lights, intoxicated with arsenic and envious of Kamala who thrived on a diet of an uncircumcised phallus that inspired Chandra to compose a poem for post-pubescent Amina's anticipated defloration to an enemy king as the men with funny caps assembled and feasted on chicken wings that were harvested from the puffin colony of Cape Farewell and done four ways, Madonna finally relinquishing the title of Material Girl to Manimala who was slaugthered by Hermogenes as commanded by El Patron, her meat mixed with beef from the holy cows of Kolkata, shipped to Buenos Aires and sold in Latuada's butcher shops where the goat meat for the Thursday Club originated and cooked into a dry but delectable adobo.

As Year 1 of the pandemic approach its conclusion, quarantined rats stirred when Psykhe squirted holy pee to bless an offering of silver-plated pancit canton, the hallucination of previous orgies bypassing Corylus as she preen before a sacrifice of reheated adobo to be reincarnated in a place of happiness where Psykhe was unbuttoned, her nipples torridly tounged to unmasked its pigment, frantic fingers feeling the countours of a wet honeypot where humans emerged before she was impaled on a huge erection, her infertile gonads sprayed with gallons of lust while the Phantom Bikers devoured fried chicken wings to compensate for a rained out Saturday.     

LAST WEEK

We called it our Thursday Club but since we see each other almost everyday, our bouts with ice cold Red Horse extra strong beer can be any other day like Wednesday after two from our group finally received their largesse from a local politician, or Saturday to drive away the unseen spirits of the night, and of course our usual Thursday set where for this week, chicharong baboy, crispy mushroom, fried tilapia and pork barbecue accompanied the poison of our choice. 

And for the second week in a row, the great Rabindranath Tagore came to enthrall us with the story of Mini, a young bride with a Rene Imperial chin who was unjustly convicted to death after a sensational trial that was chronicled by Bhupati as his lonely wife was being banged by his own brother because Raicharan lost his little master and the tomboyish Mriyani finally succumbed to wife duty so Phatik ran away to Hemant who defied family and tradition for love which made the miser Kundu mad. 

In the same week, the terrace and front yard of the house in Bakal 2 was finally improved where Commander Martin Servaz and Capt. Irene Ziegler laid down the frozen dead of St. Martin for Dr. Zeyolo Zantoko, the African doctor of Marly-Gormont, to perform an autopsy under the watchful guard of the Nineveh SWAT Team who retrieve the cadavers from Mosul. 

But it was a lazy week for the Phantom Bikers who opted to focus on harvesting the minimum weekly Vitality reward because finding Agnes in Marrakech would have been a lot easier for Brix in 2016, at Hotel Amani's rooftop restobar where she would often watch the sun set in the Atlas mountains with Cathy and Oxfam's team to CoP 22 while in Vancouver, first love was redefined by Nick's gift of life to Ali which is actually a much used storyline.

SAVVATOPHOBIA

The most anticipated day of the month is when those who labored were rewarded with "chines of beef, venison in Brew'z, pestelles of reede deer and carpes of young veale" that were prepared in the castle kitchens of York, Lancaster, Leeds and Arundel for the temple in Bakal 2. 

This is among the best kept secrets of great British castles and The Gaffer too who made sure of an ample fellowship despite being in the line of duty until he was implicated in the murder of DS John Corbett. 

Then the pandemic exploded to complicate the usual arrangements and since then, the life ahead shifted to every Saturday and Thursday of the month where the Phantom Biker rides with the Bakal 2 Bikers and get drunk with some of them, a change of routine remotely acknowledged from Bari by Madame Rosa and Momo. 

I am imagining a roasted pork belly for the noche buena but Roy Goode said Christmas is as godless as Frank Griffin and the festival of Saturnalia in La Belle, New Mexico to which German and Sara begged me to don't listen because it was the Spaniards who introduced farol for the Simbang Gabi and Panunuluyan until them Americans came with the five-pointed Star of Bethlehem.

And that was how Sunday's illness reunited Chiara and Anabel.

Somewhere in India, Mahen and Behari lusted after Binodini, a young childless and widowed MILF who seduced Tarabodho, a teenage adventurer who run away from copulating with his pubescent bride-to-be only to succumb to Giribala, a sex-starved housewife turned stage actress whom Detective Mohim suspected of being a nymphomaniac until he himself was sexually perverted by Harimati.

The Phantom Biker carried the stories by Rabindranath Tagore in his hydration bag to vanish the plague of the black cubes and be able to once again enjoy the corn of nourishment, the wine of refreshment and the oil of joy in the company of his brothers.